Only a True Southerner Knows...

[momof3]

Only a Southerner knows the difference between

a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you

don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
_____

Only a Southerner knows how many fish,

collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc.,

make up "a mess."
_____

Only a Southerner can show or point out to
you the general direction of "yonder."
_____

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly"

is. As in: "Going to town, be back directly."
_____

Even Southern babies know that "Gimme
some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance

that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
_____

All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is.

They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
_____

Only a Southerner
knows instinctively that the best

gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is

a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold

potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis,

they also know to add a large banana

puddin!
_____

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference

between "right near" and "a right far piece." They

also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile

or 20.
_____

Only a Southerner

both knows and understands the

difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and

po' white trash.
_____

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car

with the flashing turn signal is actually

going to make a turn
_____

A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun,

a verb, or an adverb.
_____

Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines.

and when we're "in line"... we talk to everybody!
_____

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will

discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
_____

In the South, y'all is singular .... all y'all is plural
_____

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to

eat them.
_____

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon,

grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye

gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green

tomatoes are not a breakfast food
_____

When you hear someone say,

"Well, I caught myself lookin',"

you know you are in the presence of

a genuine Southerner!
_____

Only true Southerners say "sweet tea"

and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need

for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea

unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want

buttermilk
_____

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities

at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH
on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart"...

and go your own way.
_____

And to those of you who are still having a hard time

understanding all this Southern stuff ... bless your hearts,

I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as

a second language!



(Ferget that Spanish stuff)

_____

And for those who are not from the South but have lived

here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on

y'alls front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
____

Bless your hearts ... y'all have a blessed day.

[Pontotocmom]

One of my girls was babysitting a some kids who were not from the south. She told one little boy to take his toys "back in yonder" He looked at her and said "What is a yonder"

[momof3]

That's too funny!! My corporate office is based out of Ohio, and when we go to meetings up there, I have an "interpreter". One of my co-workers lives in Indiana, but they have relatives from the south, so they have to explain everything I say!

[Pontotocmom]

I have a friend in Portugal, who asked me to help her with her english. She does something for Tupperware. I spent about 6 months teaching her to talk like an American. Then found out she was helping people in Africa and they didn't know what a yall was. She speaks southern english with a real pretty accent.

[King Rat]

pontotoc said:

One of my girls was babysitting a some kids who were not from the south. She told one little boy to take his toys "back in yonder" He looked at her and said "What is a yonder"

If people are going to immigrate to the south they really should learn the language.